Travel Tuesdays: Top 10 Reasons Why You (Yes, YOU!) Should Go on a Retreat

Today features children's book author and freelance writer, Julie Hedlund. 

For years I have taken at least a few days to myself – all by myself – to rest, rejuvenate, and rekindle my spirit. I started before my kids were born, and I continue the tradition to this day.

Why?

If I am always with others, I find it difficult to prevent myself from experiencing and interacting with the world solely through their eyes.  When I am alone, I can ask, "What do I see in this moment?  What is in my heart?  What am I meant to give to the world?  Where is my power?"

Second, I guarantee I am a much better mother as a result of the time away.  I am teaching my children that part of loving and respecting yourself requires being with yourself. Kids need to learn the importance of self-nurture before they reach adulthood.  Also, I think it's a good thing for kids (or spouses, partners, friends) to understand that we all have inner lives that, while connected to theirs, are also separate and deserving of respect.  

How?

I just pick the time, the place and make it happen. Simple as that. You don’t have to go to an ashram in India or hike the Appalachian Trail. Maybe a weekend in a cabin or a single night a local B & B will do the trick. Just get away from your routine, your environment, your responsibilities and yes, your family.

Here are my Top Ten reasons why:

1. Time for yourself is not a luxury; it is a necessity. If we don't take care, respect and nurture ourselves, how do we expect to do so day and in day out for others?
2. As I said, you will be a better wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend, or whatever other labels you go by, if you give yourself the gift of time.
3. Life is short. What are the things you really want to do or the places you want to go just for yourself? Nobody is going to “give” you the time, so you’ll have to take it.
4. You will get stronger. It is difficult to challenge yourself in your safe, tucked-away world at home. We are often plagued by self-doubt. Taking risks by traveling alone will quickly eradicate any conceptions you might have that you “cannot do it alone.”
5. Discover what silence sounds like.
6. In that silence, learn to listen to yourself.
7. Be the star of your own life. This is your time to be a diva. Want chocolate for breakfast? Want to sleep in the afternoon and stay awake all night? Want to have your cards read and then go dancing? This is your adventure. You choose.
8. Meet new people. Yes, you are alone, but that will not prevent you from meeting people – people you probably wouldn’t have met if you were traveling with others. Pretend each person you meet is carrying an important message for you, because s/he probably is.
9. Expand your horizons. Always wanted to be a writer a painter, or a photographer? Want to take up yoga or explore meditation? Want to do a rim to rim hike in the Grand Canyon? Try a themed retreat – one aimed at making those dreams become reality.
10. Return home refreshed, renewed, and ready to help others. How sweet your family, friends and home will be after you have spent some time away!

Julie Hedlund is a Picture Book author and Freelance Writer. She is so passionate about the need for women to take retreats, she’s fulfilling a lifelong dream by running one of her own – the first annual Writer’s Renaissance retreat in Florence, Italy in April, 2013.

Julie’s book, A TROOP IS A GROUP OF MONKEYS, will be released as an interactive storybook app for the iPad in January, 2013 by Little Bahalia Publishing. Julie is the founder and host of the 12 x 12 in 2012 picture book writing challenge, and a monthly contributor on Katie Davis’ Brain Burps About Books podcast on children’s literature. Her blog, website, and all social media coordinates can be found at http://www.juliehedlund.com.

Parents: Make Time for Yourself

Today's post doesn't offer ideas for things to do with kids. Today's post is for parents.

What will you do to take care of yourself today? 

If you're a homeschooler or stay-at-home parent of pre-schoolers, you spend lots of time with your kids. Likely all day. How do you take care of yourself? How do you make sure your own needs are met? It's easy to focus all of your time and energy on your children. But don't forget about yourself and your adult relationships.

I experienced a glimpse of this when we returned from our vacation this summer. After three full weeks of being with my kids-literally 24/7- I felt my patience running low. I was short with my kids when I wouldn't normally be. I got the message. My husband and I asked one of the grandparents to babysit and we went to dinner together. Alone. Just the two of us. I also made plans for a playdate so my kids could play with other kids and I could talk with the other mom. My patience returned.

If you have young kids returning to school for the first time, perhaps you're feeling a little blue now that they're gone- the empty house issue. Especially if you're a stay at home parent, this transition can be challenging for some. Sure, you have more freedom in how you spend your days, but you may miss your kids. Even if you're excited to be back in a regular routine and able to get all of those things done that had to wait when the kids were around, you may find yourself feeling disoriented or off-balance somehow. My kids started school on Tuesday, but it didn't hit me until yesterday. On Tuesday I was totally driven- I had a list of writing tasks I wanted to do and I plowed through them. I ended the day feeling great. But then, come Thursday, I was in a bit of  a funk- wandering around the house, unfocused, missing them.

So what did I do? I packed up my laptop and headed to my favorite local coffee shop. I grabbed a cup of coffee, sat down and got to work on this post. This strategy works for me for two reasons. 1. I don't frequent the shop with my kids so I don't think about them. 2. It gets me out of my house away from my household "To Do" list and into a place where I know I can be productive. When I work toward my writing goals I feel better.

And what about working parents? The same applies. You should find ways to take care of yourself, too. It might be hard to do, but please find the time. For you, taking care of yourself might be the reverse of the sty-at-home parent. I know this is true for my husband. When he gets home from work he just wants to hang out with our kids- hear about their day, read to them, play outside. Whatever. But he also plays soccer several times a week, as well. That's what works for him. How about you?


Taking time for yourself doesn't mean you don't love your kids or want to be with them. Rather, taking care of yourself is also taking care of your kids. You can't be a good parent/partner/husband/wife if you don't take care of yourself and your adult relationships. Figure out what you need and make sure you get it. Take a walk. Soak in the tub. Read a book. Paint. Lay in the grass and watch the clouds go by. Figure out what you need and make time for it in your week.

 And, so, I return to my initial question. What will you do to take care of yourself today?

Related Posts:
Stress Therapy: Get Back to Nature